nostalgia

 

18 years ago today I became a mother.

(To one of the sweetest girls on the planet!)

I'm feeling very nostalgic today.

On all of my kid's birthdays I think about them all day.

I try to remember what I was feeling that day, and how I felt the first time I held them.

Akayla was my first baby.
Everything was new.
Scary, exciting, and intimidating.

I was so young, and though I was the oldest of 7 siblings, I was unprepared for the way it would feel to have my very own child.

I remember looking at her for the first few days in awe.
I hardly slept at all, and I just stared at her and snuggled with her.
I couldn't believe she was my very own baby, and that she grew inside of me.
She was so beautiful!

She was due on April 15th - tax day.
On that day at my appointment the doctor thought I was measuring really big for 40 weeks so he ordered a quick ultrasound.
We still didn't know what we were having, and I would have been furious if they had given me any hints that day!

The ultrasound tech said my baby was most likely about 10 1/2 pounds.
My doctor panicked and said I would have to do a c-section.
I cried and begged him to let me try and have a regular delivery, which he agreed to do.

I still don't remember why I had to wait a few more days, but on April 18th at about 6:30 in the morning Dave and I were headed to the hospital.

I was scared to death.

So many things I regret about that day, but I was young and ignorant.

I was hooked up to pitocin and after several hours of labor I was given an epidural.
The epidural relaxed me enough to finally fully dilate, and then I got to push for 2 hours.
At the end I was vomiting and shaking, and I wondered if I would ever be done.

Then suddenly she was in my arms and I would never be the same again.

She was 9 1/2 pounds.
Hard to believe when you look at my 5'2" girl that weighs less than 100 pounds.

Everyone says to enjoy your kids while they're young because they grow up so fast.

Well, they're right.
18 years has flown by.

But I have enjoyed every minute with my girl.

She has become an amazing person (woman?  what do you call an 18 year old???), and I am the luckiest mom in the world to have been given the chance to have her in my life.

She has always been good.
The only issues we've ever had have involved boys.
They are her biggest weakness!

And motherhood has been the greatest adventure of my life!

I wouldn't trade these last 18 years (+ the extra pounds, stretch marks, or heart aches) for anything!


good things:
moms
heaters
strawberries