I haven't expressed lately how much I love mothering girls.
I have the great privilege and responsibility to raise 7 incredible daughters.
Some of the things my husband and I love about these precious girls:
nurturing nature
sensitivity
motherly from the start
sweetness
caring & compassionate
drawn to pretty things
smart & strong
These are things that I love about all women.
Lately there has been a lot of stirring on facebook and other places from a group of women from my church who aren't happy with their role.
They have confused "roles" with "equality", and by so doing they assume that if one person doesn't have the same role as another, somehow they don't have the same value.
It disturbs me that they think if they create enough of a stir, or if they make a persuasive enough argument this would change doctrinal matters in the church. To me this is a reflection of their lack of faith in the call of a prophet.
It is offensive to me that they underrate the role of women. My role.
Why isn't it enough to be a woman? Why must we also take men's role?
This doesn't mean that a woman isn't capable of doing all the same thing a man does, and a woman should be paid on the same scale as a man. I encourage my daughters to reach for their dreams and work towards successful careers. I want my daughters to find joy in the path the Lord has set for them. I also hope they will each have the opportunity to be mothers!
I find joy in the service and good that I do in my church.
I understand that there is a need for both men and women - and that each one holds divine roles in a family and in a church.
In the end it all comes down to..... faith, and whether or not the Lord has called prophets again.
I hope that people reading articles from different sources about this will go to the original source before they solidify their opinion. So many times things are taken out of context and would be understood so much better if they went straight to the source.
I really hope my lovely daughters will know how strong they are.
They are strong without men, and if/when they find a special man that is the perfect puzzle piece for them - they will be equals and will compliment each other in their divinely appointed roles.
(Another blog that explains things so much better than I ever could here.)
I've been feeling so sentimental lately.
I found these sweet pictures and cried because my girls are getting so grown up.
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| Spring 2004 Akayla, Corina, Adriana, Annalisa & baby Mariah |
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| Spring 2006 Mariah, Adriana & Annalisa |
Oh my heart!
I miss those little girlies!
good things:
a new trampoline
funny things kids say
watching Studio C with my besties
3 comments:
Angela,
I've pondered over whether to comment or not--and finally decided to do so.
I agree and love most of this post---except, this one line keeps driving me a little batty:
"But I also teach them that no career would give them the same joy or satisfaction as raising a righteous family."
On the one hand, I think my mother did this as well---sort of. I understand, knowing you, that you basically mean that you teach your daughters (and I'm sure your sons too) that having a righteous family will bring them a certain joy and satisfaction that is different from other joys and other types of satisfaction. But--I also know, from personal experience (not from you)---that when this sentence is stated as it is in this post---for those of us whom have not had options other than a career, all this sentence brings is pain.
See--what was different about my mother, is that she did not state that "if you do not raise a family, you will not have joy and satisfaction" or even "you will not have the SAME" joy or satisfaction as others who have those blessings". Instead she taught me that you can find joy and satisfaction in anything you do, as long as you're doing what the Lord wants and intends for you to be doing.
I have literally been attacked and judged, even by some in my extended family, as they have assumed that I have chosen my life to purposefully not include raising children and having a family--when the reality is FAR from that. But one of the ways they have attacked me is by saying things like "You can NEVER find as much happiness, joy, and satisfaction from a job or a career as you can from raising children and having a family". I've heard church leaders say this as well. And honestly, I beg to differ.
The Lord set me on the road to my career at 11 years old. I did not choose it--it chose me. The earthly mission I have been placed on may be different than many women's in the church---and believe me, the reality of being different than most has been incredibly painful at times----although it's hard to describe, I have learned (and even had it revealed to me) that the Lord knew what He was doing, and still does when it comes to my life. Even so much that He has blessed me with a career that has brought me a huge amount of joy and satisfaction. It's not easy, and not every day brings joy and satisfaction---but that is true of being a mother as well. But--in those beautiful moments, when I can see the hand of the Lord's working in student's lives, in people's lives whom I serve--when I can see that small things can grow into large difference for people--the Lord allows me a glimpse into the eternities, just as He may bless a mother with at times.
I think, in our Mormon venacular, we need to get away from teaching our daughters that if they don't get "same", they are far less likely to get joy and satisfaction. I know that is not what your words intended---but unfortunately--that is how people interpret those words--and have used them against those of us who do not get "same" in this life. Perhaps, similar to my mother, what we need to teach is that "no matter what circumstances you find yourself in, if you're doing what the Lord wants you to be doing, whether it's being an at home mother, an at work mother, a woman with a career, a woman with a job, or any other circumstance, if you're doing what the Lord wants, and following His plan, He can bless you with joy and satisfaction that what you do is part of His plan for you".
Anyway--just know that I understand what you truly meant--as I know you do not use words to injure (as others have in my past)---but that line has continued to "bug" me--so I decided to say something.
But--I do definitely agree with your message overall!
Mary P.
Mary, I sent you a private message. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and I COMPLETELY agree. I was thinking along one line and I didn't mean it the way it sounded. I'm sorry for that. I'm grateful that you shared your thoughts and experience - as always I love your perspective.
I love mothering girls too! My dad always said "Girls are special people," and I now see why he felt that way. I love my boys very much too, but I feel a sisterhood with my sweet daughters.
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